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Dumb Criminals 
South Carolina A man walked into a local police station,
dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, informed the desk
sergeant that it was substandard cut, and asked that the
person who sold it to him be arrested immediately.
In Modesto, CA. Steven Richard King was arrested for
trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a
weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun,
but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
A fellow robbed a supermarket of about $5000. The local
newspaper ran the story, but with the amount printed was
$7000. The thief called the newspaper to complain about
the inaccuracy and to suggest that maybe the store manager
ripped off the extra $2000 and was unjustly blaming the
thief. The people at the newspaper kept him busy on the
phone giving his version of the story while the police traced
the call to a phone booth and arrived to arrest him while he
was still talking to the newspaper
Belgium - A man suspected of robbing a jewelry store
said he couldn't have done it because he was busy breaking
into a school at the same time. So Police arrested him for
breaking into the school
Virginia Beach - A bank robber in got a nasty surprise when a
a time-release dye pack designed to mark stolen money
exploded in his underwear. The robber apparently stuffed
the loot down the front of his pants as he was running out
the door. "He was seen hopping and jumping around,"
said police spokesman Mike Carey, "with an explosion taking
place inside his pants." Police have the man's charred
trousers in custody.
Dallas, Texas - For some reason, a blind man in Dallas
decided to steal a television set. During the burglary, all
seemed to be going well. But the blind man's getaway left a
little to be desired. A neighbor spotted him when he walked
into a tree.
New Mexico - Robin Lancaster, 18, who was in court on
charges of driving with a suspended license. When the judge
entered the courtroom he respectfully stood up and removed
his hat. And that's when his real trouble began. From
underneath that hat out fell a marijuana cigarette. Busted!!
Berlin, Germany - a couple of 19 year olds were hungry after a
night of partying. They decided to break into the local
supermarket where they helped themselves to several
handfuls of Easter candy. An eyewitness spotted them and
called the cops who simply followed the trail of chocolate
bunnies and eggs to the nearby apartment
Mandeville, Florida - authorities are still trying to figure out
what was going through this guy's mind. The criminal
broke into a home, picked up a box of strawberries someone
had left near the door and put them on the kitchen table. He
then took a shower and changed clothes, getting fresh
clothes from the closet and leaving his old jeans behind, with
$51.65 in the pockets. He then left without taking anything
else. Police are trying to find him before he leaves money
behind again.
Sao Paulo, Brazil - a gang of brain waves were attempting to
rob a car repair center when they were interrupted by a pizza
delivery guy who was bringing lunch for one of the
employees. The crooks simply locked him up along with the
other employees. The staff at the pizza shop began to worry
when their guy didn't return so they sent another delivery
man over to see what had happened. He too was locked up
and when he didn't return the manager of the pizza shop
went to investigate for himself. You can guess what happened,
they locked him up along with the others. By this time
the pizza shop owner had almost run out of employees
so he called the cops who arrived in time to arrest the
crooks and free the hostages.
This criminal really needs to take a course on how to be
more assertive. From Pine Bluff, Arkansas comes the story
of Julius Coffman who entered the Bank of America carrying a
trash bag. He had no weapon but instead stuck his hand in
his pocket, pretending it was a gun. He walked up to the
teller and demanded that she fill it with cash. The teller
didn't take a guy holding a trash bag seriously so
she told him, 'sorry, the bank was fresh out of money'. One
of the other tellers offered him some deposit slips.
Frustrated, He dropped the bag and walked out and
Police found him nearby.
Colorado - Walter Green and John Moore checked into the
Red Roof Inn with their girlfriends. A few minutes later they
burst into the lobby, demanding cash. Upon getting their
loot, they went back upstairs to their hotel room. They
were arrested there a short time later.
Donald Adams was very proud of his stash of marijuana. As
he was cruising through town, he spotted what he thought
was a friend of his. To attract his attention, he dangled a
small bag filled with a leafy green substance out the window
of his car. Maybe he should get his vision checked. He
waved the bag of pot not at his friend but at the car of an
off duty police officer who was in uniform and was heading
into work. Oops.
Oslo, Norway - an unidentified man decided to break into an
apartment. And of all the apartments in Oslo, he picked the
worst possible one. You see, Oslo television has one of
those "Big Brother" shows where cameras are set up all
over the house. Yep, that's the house he tried to break into.
17 video cameras recorded his every move and the whole
thing was shown live over the internet
Christopher Jansen, on trial in March in Pontiac, Michigan,
said he had been searched without a warrant. The
prosecutor said the officer didn't need a warrant because a
"bulge" in Christopher's jacket could have been a gun.
"Nonsense," said Christopher, who happened to be wearing
the same jacket that day in court. He handed it over so the
judge could see it. The judge discovered a packet of cocaine
in the pocket and laughed so hard he required a five minute
recess to compose himself.
Detroit: A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop
nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted,
"Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled first
bandit shot him.
KANSAS CITY - Police say a man who was playing law
enforcement officer made a big mistake Tuesday night
in Kansas City. He stopped a real policeman.
Officials say the man used a flashing blue light atop
his car to pull over an off-duty officer. The officer, in
his personal car, was suspicious because Kansas City
police use a combination of red and blue emergency
lights.
DECATUR, Ala. -- Police have arrested a Huntsville
man who they say tried to steal hundreds of dollars
worth of saw blades from a hardware store by stuffing
them down his pants.
A woman who dialed a wrong number didn't let that stop
her from trying to trade prescription drugs for crack
cocaine. Even though the wrong number she dialed was for
the St. Tammany Parish office.
A carjacker got an unwelcome surprise
when he targeted a van full of Judo wrestlers
Robber politely waits in line with other customers -
One robbery suspect, caught at 10 a.m., didn't want to be
late. So, he waited outside the Zions Bank dressed in full
robbery gear, donning a face mask over a hooded sweater,
before the bank opened. He politely waited in line with other
customers, said Capt. Dave Burdett of the Salt Lake County
Sheriff's Office.
